I hope you had a great weekend. It was a good one over here. Spring is probably my favorite season in Austin. There are wildflowers everywhere, the weather is gorgeous, and it seems like there are at least 18 festivals going on every weekend.
I did manage to pry myself away from the sunshine to share three Montessori-friendly baby products that are new to us this time around, and that we’re absolutely loving!
I want to preface this by saying that baby stuff can be expensive. The internet can make you feel like you need all the things. You need zero speciality items to practice Montessori with your infant at home.
It is absolutely about the way that you interact with and view your baby, not about buying special toys and products.
That said, there are some beautiful Montessori-friendly baby products out there and they can certainly be a fun way to watch your baby interact with their world.
Topponcino
The topponcino is a small, infant-sized mattress. The idea is that using this mattress to hold the infant provides him with a consistent, comfortable, supportive surface to be held on, particularly if he is being passed from person to person.
I don’t think we’ve necessarily used the topponcino as intended, or how I thought we would, but I have absolutely been loving it and am a little sad that Lilah is quickly getting too long for it.
I personally did not like holding Lilah using the topponcino. It felt awkward to me, and not nearly as comfortable or snuggly as just holding her.
I do, however, love laying her on the topponcino. It makes it super easy to gently transfer her from room to room – something that we’ve had to do a lot to keep up with the action of our busy toddler. We have wood floors and the topponcino also provides a much softer spot for her to lay on than just a blanket on the floor.
I also love that it’s a clearly defined space that is hers. I think this is really helpful if you have older siblings around.
I would recommend the topponcino a lot more for a second (or third or fourth!) baby. I’m not sure I would have found it as useful or necessary if I had had it when James was a baby, as I didn’t need to move him from room to room so much or create clear boundaries to protect him from little feet.
I have always loved the Montessori mobile progression. I really wanted these when James was a baby, but I am not AT ALL crafty, and didn’t want to buy them when we had so many other new baby / new house expenses.
This post gives a great overview of the Montessori mobile progression. I also love these ideas for inexpensive alternatives.
My mom made me a Munari mobile (the first in the set) and I was also given a beautiful variation of the Munari by a lovely former Montessori teacher here in Austin, so we did use those with James and he loved them.
This time around, we already had all of the baby things, and a set of mobiles was one of the first purchases I made when I was pregnant. (I chose this set, but there are many options on Etsy.)
It has been so fun to watch Lilah interact with the different mobiles. She gets visibly excited when looking at them and kicks her little legs and smiles. She will concentrate on them for a long time.
I like to hang the mobiles near her mirror. I find that this helps younger babies, who often lay with their head to the side, to view the mobile. Both she and James began by watching the mobile in the mirror, rather than looking straight up at it.
I often bring Lilah to her mobiles when I’m helping James get ready for his nap and she is generally content to play there on her own for a while. I like to turn the ceiling fan on low so that the mobile slowly moves with the air flow.
I want to note that, as they develop so quickly, babies do move through the progression quite rapidly. While Lilah is currently using the third mobile in the series, I think she would still love the first two. You could certainly just make or buy a couple of the mobiles if you don’t want to invest in the whole series, especially if you’re only planning to use them for one child.
This is not specifically Montessori, but is definitely in line with many of the design principles.
I actually interviewed the founder of Lovevery a while back. At the time, James was too old for a baby gym and I wasn’t pregnant with Lilah yet, but I knew I would want this whenever I did have another baby. I was super excited when I received it from my parents for Christmas. It is beautiful.
It is simple with soft colors and natural materials. It is interesting without being overstimulating.
It features different areas that you can hide or reveal based on baby’s developmental stage.
I love how this baby gym looks too. The black, white, and grey color palette blend into the home much more than the bold colors so often used for baby gyms.
They also offer play kits with Montessori-style toys for each stage of baby’s development. I am so tempted to get these! The problem is that I already have very similar versions of some of the toys, so I’m not sure it would be worth it, but they look lovely.
I can’t find the exact one we have, but we also have a simple wooden play gym, similar to this, which is a great, less expensive alternative.
What baby products do you love?
This post contains affiliate links. All opinions are my own. Thank you for your support!
This is actually my first ever giveaway, and I could not be more excited to share this book with you today.
I was so excited when I heard that Simone Davies, creator of The Montessori Notebook blog, was releasing a book, all about toddlers.
As a Montessori nerd, I love reading pretty much anything to do with Montessori, but I was especially eager to read this particular book, as I have a toddler of my own.
I’ve always loved toddlers, especially since my time as an assistant in a Montessori toddler classroom before I became a Montessori 3-6 teacher, but this doesn’t mean they can’t be challenging.
It is a stage so full of wonder and joy, but it’s almost like you have to speak a different language to make the most of it.
The Montessori Toddler outlines how to do everything from get your child out the door without a battle, to provide beautiful Montessori-style activities for them in your home.
It is a beautiful book and is easy to read – so much so that I easily made it through it in my post-baby sleep deprived state. It is the kind of book that is a pleasure to read cover to cover, but that you can also easily pick up and simply flip to the section you’re interested in.
Perhaps my favorite thing about Simone’s book though is the tone. I find so many parenting books to be almost lofty or judgy – as if there were one right way to raise these little humans.
This isn’t like that at all. It regularly acknowledges that parenting decisions are super personal, while giving tips for how to communicate with toddlers and maximize the joy of this unique stage.
The entire book is super helpful, but one of my favorite sections is actually the “Instead of this, say that” guide in the Appendix. I think this would be a super helpful reference, even for someone completely unfamiliar or uninterested in Montessori, for how to effectively talk to toddlers.
I’m excited to be able to offer a copy of this wonderful book to a reader. Please leave a comment with either your favorite thing about toddlers, or your biggest challenge with toddlers, on this post and I’ll randomly select a winner on Monday, March 25.
I received a copy of The Montessori Toddler, but was not otherwise compensated for this post. All opinions are my own.
This giveaway is now closed and the winner has been notified.
I can hardly believe that it’s been two whole months since Lilah has joined our family!
She has truly been the sweetest addition and it’s almost hard to believe she hasn’t been here all along.
I love looking back on James’s monthly updates, and reading about babies of similar ages on other moms’ blogs, so wanted to capture what little Lilah is up to these days.
Personality
It has been so fun to catch little glimpses of Lilah’s personality as she wakes up a little bit more from the sleepy newborn haze.
If I had to choose one word to describe her, it would be sweet. She seriously has the sweetest little smile and loves to snuggle.
She is not a super needy baby, she is often content to lay nearby and watch the action, but she does love to be held in the evening when she’s winding down before bed.
Her favorite things right now seem to be:
Watching her big brother! She looks at him with complete adoration and it melts my heart every time.
Staring at our ceiling fans – they are black against the white ceiling, so high contrast, and she loves them.
Music – I frequently play classical music for her and it seems to really relax and captivate her. James loves to sing her Twinkle Twinkle too “to make her feel calm and peaceful”.
Loud sounds (aka giant buckets of Duplos being dumped onto the floor nearby….)
Sleep
I’m not going to go into too much detail on sleep because it changes so frequently! (If it takes me three days to write a post, the sleep section changes about four times…)
Overall, she is gradually sleeping for longer stretches (max has been 7 hours) at night, with some off nights thrown in there.
She almost always falls right back to sleep after waking up to eat at night these days, which is a new development – fingers crossed this continues!
She has days when all she wants to do is snooze and she takes multiple long naps, and days when she takes a series of 30 minute naps.
Her sleep has been steadily improving overall and she seems happy and well rested, so we’re pretty happy with it!
Routine
While she is certainly not on a clock-based schedule, it finally feels like we have a bit of a routine down, which is great news for this type-A mama!
She’s generally up for the day around 7-7:30. I feed her and we either hang out on the couch with James and read books (she loves laying on the couch next to me because it’s a prime viewing spot for the ceiling fan, which is pretty much her favorite thing ever) or she chills in her lounger or topponcino while James plays Duplos nearby.
She’s usually ready for her first nap after about 1 hour. I swaddle her (with one hand out because she loves to suck on her hand), sing her a song, and place her in her bassinet. Sometimes she falls asleep right away and sometimes I go in to soothe her once or twice.
Just a note – many Montessori families choose not to swaddle because it in some ways goes against the Montessori principle of freedom of movement. We choose to swaddle for sleep because of the SIDS prevention guidelines, and because I’ve found it really helps my children sleep – to each his own!
Her nap duration is all over the place right now – sometimes it’s 30 minutes, sometimes almost 3 hours, we never really know!
When she’s up from her first nap, we frequently have some sort of outing like the park, story time, or the Wildflower Center. Sometimes we just stay home or go for a walk around the neighborhood (James loves to ride his balance bike while we walk and is getting so good!)
Lilah generally snoozes in the Ergo or K’tan while we’re out.
We come home and James eats lunch, often while I feed Lilah. I help him get ready for his nap while Lilah either hangs out with her mirror and mobile, or lays nearby on her topponcino if she wants to be with us while we read books and sing songs.
This part of the day has gotten SO much easier now that she is out of the fussy newborn stage. There were some days that she screamed and cried the whole time we got ready for James’s nap and I felt so badly for both of them – not a restful way to go to bed.
Since she naps so frequently, she is generally ready for her third nap by the time James is in bed or soon after. This means I have at least 30 minutes to eat lunch or blitz clean the house, woohoo!
Some days she sleeps for his whole nap time and some days she’s up again quickly and we hang out together. These days are nice as well because I get some rare one on one time with her. I love laying next to her on the floor and just talking to / watching her. She gets the biggest smiles when we do this.
When James is up, he has a snack and we play at home most afternoons, often in the backyard. Lilah sometimes takes another nap in her bassinet, but this often ends up being in the K’Tan while I hang out with James in the backyard. She has a hard time falling asleep for this last nap, but the evening goes so much more smoothly if she gets at least a little power nap in the late afternoon.
On an ideal day, she wake up from her last nap around 5-5:30. This seems to work perfectly for a 7-7:30 bedtime.
We play or read books until my husband gets home, eat dinner, and begin the bedtime shenanigans. Lilah gets a bath every other day. She doesn’t love it, but she’s coming around.
I feed her and put her to bed while my husband does bath time with James, and then I help with his bed time.
She usually goes to bed between 7 and 7:30 – a recent development that has made me SO happy!
Like many newborns, she had been going to bed later, around 9. I went to bed around the same time since I was up with her at night and getting up early with James. This meant I had zero free time at night, which was a little tough. I love having time at night now to just zone out or catch up with my husband. It makes all the difference.
Of course every day is different, but this is generally how things are looking around here with a two month old and a two and a half year old.
I really love this not-quite-newborn, but still tiny stage. She is still super portable and snuggly, but now rarely cries unless she’s tired. Every stage is wonderful in its own way, and we are certainly enjoying this one!
If you have kids, did you like the newborn stage? It seems like some people love it and others much prefer older babies / kids.
This post contains affiliate links. All opinions are my own.
I hope everyone is having a great week. It is a good one so far over here.
I’ve been trying to decide whether or not to do updates on Lilah like I did with James and I think I will, probably until she’s one or two like I did with him. At the end of the day, I just really love having them to look back on!
I plan on posting a Lilah update soon, but until then, here’s a look at how our family has been adjusting in these first seven weeks with two little ones.
Personally, I was a lot less nervous about having an infant this time, but definitely anxious about what it would be like to have two and, specifically, how my toddler would adjust, so hopefully this is helpful to someone!
The honeymoon period
We are so fortunate that my husband got six weeks off for paternity leave. I know this is not the norm, and it certainly made a huge difference in these early weeks.
In some ways, his paternity leave was easier (for me haha – probably not so much for him) this time because there were so many obvious ways that he could help.
My husband is a super helpful person, like it’s one of his defining characteristics, but with a breastfed infant, there is only so much a husband can do. He certainly helped a ton with diapers and soothing when James was born, but I obviously was the one feeding him around the clock.
This time around, he definitely took the lead on taking care of our toddler. We tried to switch off as much as possible so that he got to spend time with the baby and I got to spend time with James, but in the first couple of weeks it was too hard for me physically to be down on the floor playing Legos or running around the backyard.
Having my husband around definitely eased the transition for James as he really got just as much attention as usual, if not more, just from a different person. (Spoiler alert – this does not mean the transition has been easy for our little two year old….)
The other wonderful thing about the early weeks was that Lilah often took a long nap at the same time James did. This meant Nick and I frequently had a 2-3 hour stretch to get stuff done / get out of the house / connect with each other.
We lucked out with some truly beautiful weather (love Texas winter!) and I spent many nap times simply sitting outside reading this book or this one (<- giveaway soon!) and enjoying the sunshine.
We absolutely had a few very rough days in the early weeks, and there was naturally very little sleep, but I seriously think I will cherish that time together as a family forever. I very much hope that longer paternity leave becomes a more regular thing in this country!
What we’re doing differently
Overall, we’re still just stumbling through this newborn time in a foggy haze, alternating between cherishing the cutest little squishy baby and looking forward to when she is slightly older and (*hopefully*) sleeps a little better.
There are a few things we’re doing differently though, mostly regarding sleep. Here are the main differences:
Naps
When James was an infant, he took all of his naps on me. This was not a conscious choice, I just knew absolutely nothing about baby sleep and was keeping him up too long, so he always fell asleep on me when he was nursing.
I really loved all of the snuggles, but it was also hard to be essentially trapped all day and unable to get anything done. We transitioned him to napping in his bed (I think around 2 months?), but it was difficult.
I knew with Lilah that I wanted to help her nap in her bed from the very start. I put her down for at least one nap a day in her bassinet starting the day after we got home from the hospital – and it went great!
She frequently took 2-3 hour naps in her bassinet in the early weeks, which meant I could spend time with James. I did still let her sleep on me though, mostly in the afternoons and evenings, because the feeling of holding a sleeping baby is probably my favorite part of the newborn stage and I didn’t want to miss it!
Now that she’s a little older, naps are a bit trickier, but I’m still trying to help her nap in her bassinet as much as possible, so that I can play with James, and so that she learns how to fall asleep on her own.
I often let her sleep on me while he’s napping though – got to get those snuggles in! I also think this helps keep her from getting too overtired, as her naps on me are generally about 5 times longer than her naps in the bassinet.
The bassinet
This is nothing we really did differently, but Lilah seems very content to sleep in her bassinet – thank goodness! James boycotted the bassinet from day 1 and never slept in there, so he transitioned to his Montessori floor bed in his room right away.
This wouldn’t be a bad thing except that we wanted to sleep in the same room for the first six months per the SIDS prevention recommendations, which meant an air mattress on his floor – not the most comfortable! I was very happy when she took to the bassinet right away.
Drowsy, but awake
We frequently placed Lilah in her bed completely asleep in the earliest days because, well, she was almost always sleeping!
As soon as she began to “wake up” a bit more though, we started offering naps when she was drowsy, but not asleep, and this definitely seems to have made a difference in her ability to fall asleep on her own.
I remember spending hours rocking James to sleep at night when he was little and she mostly just goes back to sleep on her own after eating in the middle of the night (except two nights ago, when she was up from 12-3, so who knows….). Overall I think it’s helped, but every baby is different of course, so she could just be a naturally better sleeper.
Not responding to every “peep”
With James, I’m pretty sure I got him out of bed and rocked him or fed him every time he made a “peep”.
With Lilah, I’m really trying to determine if she’s actually waking up / hungry or if she’s just making noises as her sleep cycle transitions. This is hard to do in the middle of the night, but I do think it’s led to some longer stretches of sleep!
She only woke up to eat once last night from 7:45 – 6:20 and it was everything. I’m sure this will change and we’ll have good nights and bad nights, but it gives me hope 🙂
I really like this book for information on baby sleep. Sleep is such a personal thing and I don’t agree with everything in this book, but it definitely helped me understand how long babies of different ages can generally stay awake without getting over-tired and how to tell if they’re hungry or just making noise.
A big part of Montessori is freedom of movement, even for little babies. This means lots of time playing on the floor, and not lots of time spent in strollers / seats / carriers. Hence with James, I used the carrier for errands, but never really at home.
Lilah hangs out in the K’tan carrier almost every afternoon. This is because, while she generally naps well in her bassinet, afternoon naps are harder and I simply can’t spend all afternoon trying to get her to nap. Even if I wanted to, James won’t let me!
She often takes her late afternoon nap in the carrier and it lets me get in some snuggles and also spend time with James and prep (not cook!) dinner.
I will say this carrier hurts my back when I use it too much, but I may just be doing it wrong. I’ve found this video super helpful with putting it on!
Things that have been easier
Breastfeeding
This is definitely the number one difference in my experience with my second child, versus my first.
I have no idea if it has been easier because I have some experience, or if Lilah is just more of a natural with eating, but breastfeeding has been 1000X easier.
James struggled to gain weight, which meant I had to pump after every time I fed him for a while to keep up milk supply and supplement with bottles. He also took an hour pretty much every time he ate. With a little newborn eating every two hours, this meant I spent 10-12 hours a day breastfeeding, plus pumping. That was a lot!
In contrast Lilah takes 10-20 minutes each time she eats and is gaining weight like a champ. This has been such a huge relief to me.
Anxiety
I’m naturally a super anxious person, so I still have lots of anxiety, but it’s for sure less all-consuming this time around. A lot of this probably has to do with Lilah’s strong weight gain, and I think some of it has to do with just being busier and having less time to worry.
I am also *really* trying not to Google everything, and to rely a little more on my intuition, which is not my strong suit.
I actually think my husband and I are a great balance with this. I like to read all the things, while he generally just kind of wings it.
Watching him, I actually think he has a lot better intuition with what Lilah needs sometimes because he’s able to watch her cues without all of the (conflicting!) noise from the experts clouding his thinking. Something I’m working on!
Sleep
I already talked a lot about this above, but not having to pump in the middle of the night, coupled with Lilah usually going back to sleep on her own, mean a lot more sleep for us. The flip side of this is I can’t sleep in because of my early rising toddler, but it still feels better to sleep more in the middle of the night.
Note: Over the three of four days it’s taken me to write this post, she has slept so poorly at night, so hopefully we’ll get back to good sleep soon! Baby sleep is always changing….
Things that have been harder
Toddler Transition
Watching James become a big brother has been beautiful in so many ways, but has also been one of the hardest parts of parenting for me.
He is so sweet to Lilah, but I can also see him struggling with this huge change, and it breaks my heart.
I want so much to be able to give him 100% of my attention during what I know is a hard time for him, but obviously that’s not possible.
I try to make sure he has some good one on one time every day and I remind myself constantly of how much I love having a brother and sister. I know this will be a good experience for him in the end, but it is still really hard to see him struggling (and really hard to remain patient even though I know his behavior is a natural expression of his feelings around this big transition).
Check out my post on helping toddlers transition with a new baby here!
On the flip side, it is also hard to feel like I can’t give Lilah 100% of my attention. I feel like so much of the day she is just along for the ride.
I know she is getting a lot out of just being in the midst of family life, but I still really love the times when she is awake during James’s nap and I can just watch her enjoy her Munari mobile or book, both of which she currently loves!
Right now, every day is different. Some days are so good and sweet and some days are so, so hard.
I am trying to cherish the good days and moments and breathe through the hard ones, remaining as calm as possible.
Thanks for reading along – I would love to hear your experiences with having a baby or second child, or any way you deal with big changes in life.
Please note that this post contains affiliate links. All opinions are my own.
It’s been almost a month since we welcomed our newest little one, Lilah Rose, into the family.
As time speeds along at record pace, I wanted to take some time to record her birth story before the details fade away. I loved reading birth stories when I was pregnant, so wanted to share. (You can find James’s birth story here!)
Lilah’s birth started out eerily similar to James’s. We went in to my doctor for an appointment at 40 weeks, 5 days. Just like with James, she did a sonogram to check on baby and informed me that my amniotic fluid levels were too low and I needed to go upstairs to the hospital to be induced that morning.
This is the exact same thing that happened with James, down to the day. The only difference was that this time we had a curious little two year old in tow!
I called my Mom, who so kindly offered to take care of James when I went into labor. She had to drive from Houston (about a three hour drive), so I wanted to call her right away. I also had a wonderful local friend offer to take care of James if my mom couldn’t make it, but I figured it would be a while since I was being induced (it took almost 24 hours when I was induced with James).
We grabbed our bags from the car, including a bag of snacks and a bag of books / crayons / stickers for James.
While I wasn’t super excited about being induced again, I was at least already 3 cm dilated this time, which meant I could skip Cervidil (which I reacted to really badly last time) and go straight to Pitocin.
The nurses spent some time going over forms with me (they have to tell you all of the horrible things that could go wrong and have you consent to treatments / sign a form saying they told you).
They then put in my IV for the pitocin. It took three different nurses and FOUR tries to get my IV in. My veins kept collapsing. This is nothing against the nurses, I just have really tricky veins, it’s always a bit of a struggle to get blood drawn. My bruises from the collapsed veins are just now really fading though. Eventually the IV was in and we were good to go!
They started the Pitocin at 10 AM and I slowly began to feel very mild contractions, but nothing that was bothering me. This was a stark contrast to the last time, when the Cervidil started intense back to back contractions right away.
While things were still manageable, I was definitely glad when my Mom arrived around noon to bring James back to our house. He did really well entertaining himself with snacks and books, but he also really wanted me to get out of bed and was naturally super curious about all of the machines and buttons around the room.
He put a smiley face sticker on my hand before he left and I looked at it whenever I needed a morale boost during labor. I also found various stickers placed around the room throughout the day, which always made me smile.
Things picked up soon after James left and the contractions became much more intense. My (wonderful) nurse asked me if I wanted an epidural, but I wanted to wait until my doctor came to check me to see how far along I was.
My doctor arrived around 1:30 PM and let me know I was 5 cm and completely effaced. She seemed to think this was great progress, but I was a little discouraged that things felt so intense and I had so far to go.
I requested the epidural, feeling a little disappointed in myself. This is so silly, especially since I didn’t plan to have an unmedicated birth or do any real preparation for one. I think I just felt like I made it so much further without one when James was born, but little did I know, I should have asked for the epidural sooner!
The anesthesiologist made it to my room pretty quickly and I think started the epidural around 2:15 pm. I warned him that I had some mild scoliosis (something I actually forgot until the anesthesiologist mentioned it during James’s birth). With James, this meant that the epidural worked right away on my left side, but I had to lay on my right side to let the epidural drip down to the right side of my body.
In the short time from when my doctor had left and getting the epidural, things got so much more painful. I was a little bit desperate for the relief I knew the epidural would bring at this point.
However, the relief didn’t really come. I felt no real change after he put in the epidural. He upped the dosage and eventually I realized that the pain of the contractions was only on my right side – it was pretty all-consuming so it was hard for me to pinpoint that. I lay on my right side and willed the drugs to drip down, but my nurse soon recognized that I was in transition. I had very quickly gone from 5 cm to 10 cm and there just wasn’t really time for the epidural to fully work.
Because the pushing stage had only taken 30 minutes with James, my nurse called my doctor down right away and they got the room ready for delivery.
I was honestly pretty panicked about the epidural situation in the moment, but I couldn’t actually feel any pain during the pushing stage and I could feel her moving down through the birth canal, so that part was actually pretty cool.
It was a good thing my nurse had called the doctor right away, because it took one contraction and two pushes and then little Lilah was born at 2:58 PM, weighing 8 lb 5 oz and measuring 21.5 inches long. She cried right away, looked very pink and healthy, and was placed on my immediately for skin to skin.
I got to hold her for almost an hour and a half before they took her to be weighed / measured, etc., which was magical. I couldn’t believe she had been born so quickly, that she was finally here.
The rest of the hospital stay was a bit of a sleepless blur. Between having a newborn and the constant stream of people coming into the room all night, sleep was hard to come by, but I was so, so happy (and not yet super sleep deprived) that it didn’t matter.
(Note the smiley sticker from my little buddy!)
Aside from plenty of time spent snuggling our new little girl, the highlight of the first few days was watching James meet his little sister. He was so sweet with her and all smiles and it was so special to watch their sibling relationship begin.
I’ll share more on the first few weeks soon, but wanted to post this before I forget anything.
Thanks so much for reading!
Thanks to my husband for the photos! I’ve made zero progress on my 2019 goal of learning to use the DSLR….
P.S. Check out my recent article on preparing a sibling for a new baby here!
Sprinkling (and sampling…) sugar on top of muffins
Cooking with my two year old has quickly become one of my favorite activities. I recently asked him if he’d like to help me make dinner and he ran to his shelf in the kitchen, put on his apron, and started rummaging through the spice drawer for ingredients – I think it’s safe to say he loves it as well.
Making pizza!
There are a few things that help keep our adventures in the kitchen mostly successful:
Consistent expectations – I do not expect James to always stick around for the entire recipe. He often does, but he sometimes loses interest and goes to play Legos instead, which is totally fine with me. I do expect him to wash his hands before and after helping and to wear his apron (this keeps his clothes clean, but much more importantly is used in Montessori help young children understand the beginning and end of an activity). I also expect him to be safe on his step stool (we had to put it away for the day a couple of times when he first got it, but he soon understood / respected the limits).
Child-sized tools – We certainly don’t have a miniature version of everything, but since we do cook together a lot, it’s been well worth it to get him a few tools of his own. He most frequently uses his chopper, cutting board, whisk, and masher. This site has wonderful children’s cooking tools.
Reasonable recipes – I try to include my son whenever possible, but if it is a super finicky recipe that I would be worried about him messing up, I save it for a time when he’ll be otherwise occupied. For most things we make, he most enjoys gathering tools and ingredients, washing produce, chopping, dumping in pre-measured ingredients, and mixing. He also loves adding toppings to things like pizza!
Scrubbing a butternut squash
Keeping those general tips in mind, here are 5 toddler-friendly cooking projects to try this winter:
Tearing kale leaves: I used to kind of hate tearing the leaves off of kale stems. It just seemed so tedious. James loves helping with this though, so I now rather enjoy it! Not to mention my happiness when he requested “more kale please” at the dinner table the other night. I definitely think helping prepare the ingredients helps!
Extracting pomegranate arils: This is definitely a fun one! We use the submerging in a bowl of water method. This can be a little messy though and I think the juice stains, so definitely make sure your little one has an apron or old shirt on.
Tearing herb leaves: Similar to kale, tearing the leaves off of rosemary, cilantro, thyme, etc. can be tedious, but not for tiny toddler hands! Smelling and tasting the herbs can also add to the experience.
Making applesauce: There are so many parts of this a toddler can help with. They can scrub the apples, chop them with a wavy chopper, add spices like cinnamon, and mash the cooked apples when they’re done. This is a great rainy / wintry day activity since the apples take a while to cook and fill the house with a wonderful smell.
Mashing root vegetables: Our little masher is definitely a favorite tool around here. From mashed potatoes to butternut squash, there are all sorts of things your toddler can help mash. If you have a baby who eats purees, I think this would be a great way to involve your toddler in helping make the baby’s food too.
Tearing rosemary leaves for roasted carrots
I’m always looking for new ways to get James involved in the kitchen. Please share your ideas in the comments!
While I’m so excited to have the chance to stay home with James and our new baby, once she’s born, I admit that I felt a little bit sad and guilty about pulling my two year old out of his Montessori classroom.
If I hadn’t gone back to work last year, I would never have looked into a starting him in school during the toddler years, partially because of the expense and partially because I love being home with him.
Our experience was so positive though and I’m truly glad he had that year with his wonderful teachers.
James attended the school where I taught (Hawthorne Montessori School), which made things easier because I knew and trusted his teachers and knew he was right next door if he really needed anything.
Still, I was kind of a mess the first few weeks after I went back to work. The timing wasn’t great, as it coincided with his first really bad ear infection and his transition down to one nap (which did NOT go smoothly..) I think it’s safe to say I would have been a mess no matter what was going on the first time I dropped him off though.
James, however, handled the changes in stride. He cried a couple of times the first week I dropped him off, but after that, was always so happy to go to school.
Apart from knowing that he was happy and engaged, there were three main benefits I saw in having him in a Montessori classroom:
Sense of order / putting things away
As a Montessori teacher myself, this is something we’ve practiced since my son was born (first through simply modeling putting things away each time, then later through encouraging him to do so).
Still, I think his year in Montessori school really helped solidify that this is just the way things are done. He was playing in his room during nap time today (instead of napping, but that’s a whole different story..), and while I really wanted him to go to sleep, I couldn’t help but laugh that he still put away each toy after he was done even though he was the only one in there.
I love the way Montessori toddler classes support children’s naturally developing sense of order, rather than accepting the chaos that is often seen in groups of young children.
Social / emotional development
This is probably the development I value most, simply because it’s harder to provide at home, even with plenty of playdates and group classes.
I really saw James learn about what it’s like to be part of a community last year.
He is now fascinated when he notices another child crying, and will pretend his stuffed animals are crying and comfort them.
He is also much more willing to let other children use even his favorite toys when they come over.
He still talks about his school friends regularly and loves looking at pictures of them.
I’m not sure how much of this would have naturally developed anyway over the past year, but I definitely think learning how to be successful in a group setting is important and he got a great first experience with that through his school.
Guidance with milestones (toileting, napping, etc.)
This was mostly a benefit for my own peace of mind, but it was so comforting to have reassurance from his teachers that he was ready for certain milestones, like switching to one nap and switching to underwear.
While I have a lot of experience with children, I don’t really have much experience with babies and toddlers, and these are also decisions you don’t face when you’re taking care of other people’s children.
Having another perspective, one that I really trusted, on my child’s development was wonderful.
So was having James at school last year more beneficial than having him at home with me?
I have no idea.
I will say that even after just a few weeks at home with him, I feel so much more patient and joyful in our time together. I know there were times when I was simply too tired from being with other people’s children all morning to really be the best mother that I can be.
I do know though that if he were going to be somewhere, the Montessori toddler classroom was a wonderful place for him to be, one where he knew he was loved and safe and felt secure to explore.
Did your child go to daycare or school as a toddler? What was your experience?
Any questions about Montessori toddler classes, or Montessori school in general?
Have a wonderful weekend and a wonderful Christmas if you’re celebrating!
Pregnancy is kind of funny. In some ways, it’s a flurry of activity – researching baby gear, preparing the nursery, reading all the birth stories.
In other ways, it’s such a natural time for reflection.
In these last few weeks (baby is due in less than one month!) of pregnancy, I find myself thinking a lot about what pregnancy and the newborn days were like last time, and what has been, and will be, so different this time.
Parts of both of my pregnancies have been really similar. I had fairly minimal morning sickness with both, for which I’m obviously very grateful.
I’ve been super excited and anxious for all of the changes to come with both.
That’s kind of where the similarities end though.
On the downside, I have been so, so much more tired this time. I’m not sure how much of this has to do with having a busy toddler at home, and how much has to do with hormones / the general mysteries of pregnancy, but the exhaustion has been real.
I did not feel that promised second trimester energy boost in the slightest this time. I have days where I feel so guilty for being such a boring wife and mom because I really just want to sit there and do absolutely nothing. And then I have days when I feel like a totally normal person. It’s weird.
This pregnancy has also gone by so much faster than the last one, which has been great! I am a worrier by nature, but have spent far less time buried in anxiety and counting down the days until my next doctor’s appointment so I could hear that everything is okay this time around. I fully credit this to having another human to take care of, rather than to any sort of improvement in my stress management skills. Still, I’ll take it.
I believe I have a total of one photo of myself from this pregnancy – whoops. Perhaps I can remedy that in the next few weeks.
While I find pregnancy fascinating, I’ve been even more preoccupied with thinking about how things will be different with the second baby. Of course I can’t really know, even a little bit, but since when has that ever kept someone from obsessing over something at 2 AM?
I *hope* that I will have less anxiety. I *know* that I will be more tired with the sleep deprivation combined with toddler energy levels. I’ve told everyone who asks that all I want for Christmas is a stockpile of good coffee.
I know that having a toddler at home will make things harder in some ways, but I also feel like (hope?) it might make some things easier. I have a very, very verbal and chatty two year old, so I will not face the new mom challenge of going all day without a real conversation. Sure, our conversations include whether or not we eat polar bears and whether or not jellyfish eat spaghetti, but I’ll take it.
I think the biggest difference is that my anxieties are a lot less vague. I have specific worries (Will my mom make it to Austin in time to be with James while I have the baby? Will breastfeeding be easier? How will I ever leave the house once the baby is on a nap schedule and James has to nap too?) rather than a general feeling of I have no clue what my life will be like in a month. In some ways this is probably easier, and in some ways it’s harder.
This post is about as rambley as my mind right now. Just some very random thoughts on what’s going through my mind in this last month of pregnancy with my second child. Thank you for reading if you made it this far 🙂
If you’ve been pregnant more than once, were your pregnancies similar or totally different?
Any thoughts from parents of two or more on things I’m forgetting to worry about?
So it turns out I’m not cut out for both working (even part-time), taking care of a toddler, and blogging.
I never intended to stop blogging altogether when I went back to work, but that is what happened, and that’s okay. This is a hobby for me, and like all hobbies, the amount of attention is receives will naturally ebb and flow in different phases of life.
This past year, I’ve been able to keep writing, which I love, at Motherly and The Tot and that has been enough for this time.
That being said, things are changing once again. I am expecting a baby girl at the start of January, and could not be more excited! I’ve decided to stay home with her for at least a year, like I did with James, and am very much looking forward to this special time.
I actually stopped working two weeks ago, which was bittersweet as I loved my job and very much love my colleagues.
When I thought of all of the changes to come though, I knew that I wanted some time to adjust to being at home, and to help James adjust to staying home rather than going to school, as he’ll be home this year too.
I knew this time would fly by with the holiday season in full swing and the last two weeks have certainly passed quickly!
Before this special / strange / surreal in-between time escapes me entirely, I wanted to note some intentions for how I hope to fill this time.
Be present and connect with James
This is the number one reason I wanted this extra time.
I know from watching children at school go through the new sibling transition that it can really shake their whole world. I am lucky enough to have both a brother and a sister whom I’m very close to and truly belive that a sister will be a gift to James. I also know it will be very hard at times, especially in the beginning when a lot of my attention will naturally need to be devoted to the baby.
I want to take this time to be truly present with him while he goes about his day, playing with Legos, reading books, exploring outside, and sometimes saying “no” to everything just on principle.
When I first thought about this time, I was tempted to fill it with all of the adventures. The zoo, the museums, play groups, etc.
We will certainly do some of those things, but I also want to simply slow down and be with him, to make him feel as seen and loved as I possibly can so that he goes into this transition as full and secure as possible.
Slow down for the holidays
We traveled to Wisconsin to see my husband’s family for Thanksgiving. Apart from the flights, which went as well as could be expected, it was a really relaxing trip. We spent lots of time at Grandma and Grandpa’s house, just playing and being together.
I’m hoping to take this relaxed feeling into the Christmas season.
Since Christmas comes only two weeks before my due date, my family is traveling to our house for Christmas this year, which I am very excited about!
As soon as this was decided though, I found myself frantically searching Pinterest for recipes and thinking about everything I needed to do to host Christmas.
I have to remind my self (frequently) that my family is coming here to make it easier on us, not harder. I know they’re not expecting anything other than to spend time with us, and I’m going to try (hard) to remember this and keep it low key.
Meditate and do prenatal yoga
Compared to my first pregnancy, this one has gone by in a blur. Seriously, it has seemed SO fast.
This is really great in a lot of ways because I’ve had less anxiety about everything with a very active toddler to keep up with.
It also means I’ve made less mental and emotional preparations though.
I’m hoping that regularly meditating and doing prenatal yoga videos will help me slow down, connect with this new baby, and prepare myself for all of the changes to come.
I’ll be back soon with more thoughts on preparing for our new addition. Thank you to anyone who is still reading after my long hiatus 🙂
Any advice on preparing for a second baby?
How do you approach the holiday season? Do you try to do all the things, or take it slow?
James continues to eat all the things. He REALLY likes food and some afternoons it seems like he’s asking for a snack every ten minutes. I try to limit the snacks and to make sure they’re healthy, but he pretty much always still eats well at dinner so maybe he’s legitimately just really hungry?
Some of his favorite foods right now are strawberries, grapes, cheese, salmon, beans, avocado, steamed carrots, Cheerios, ketchup, and naan (mini naan from Costco, so good).
The biggest change with his eating has been his requests for specific foods. I’m guessing this correlates with his increased language since he can now ask for whatever he wants.
This is now a daily conversation:
James: “Strawberries.”
Me: “We’re out of strawberries.”
James: “More strawberries. Grocery store.”
He basically tells me to go to the grocery store at least once a day to get whatever food he happens to be craving. Obviously I don’t actually go, but I find his demands kind of funny.
He also now loves to dip! It’s fun to give him a tiny bowl of hummus or ketchup or guacamole and watch him dip various things into it.
He got out a tiny bowl from his kitchen drawer the other day and requested a bowl of ketchup for his snack. I had to decline that one. My mom recently got him a shirt that says “I put ketchup on my ketchup” (similar one here) and it is too perfect for him.
Sleep
As of last weekend, James has fully transitioned to one daily nap. He’s been taking one nap during the week since he started school in January, but we still usually did two naps on the weekend because he slept so much better with a morning and afternoon nap! He finally seemed ready to fully transition though and I’m loving the flexibility that one nap gives us.
He goes to bed at 7, wakes up sometime between 6 and 7, and takes one nap at 12:30. Fingers crossed, but sleep is going pretty well right now.
He also now sleeps with a stuffed penguin named Herbert, whom he loves!
Physical Development
James is constantly running, climbing, and trying to pick up heavy things like large rocks. He has so much energy and is very driven to move.
We still take him for walks in the stroller sometimes, but now he really enjoys walking beside us too. He’s getting pretty good at staying on the sidewalk / trail. The only downside is when he decides he’s done walking halfway through and wants to be carried. (“Mamo holdya“). He is getting so heavy!
Language
James has had such an explosion of language the last few months! It feels like I can have real conversations with him now, which is so much fun.
He said hardly anything until Christmas. Pretty much his only word was “Dada”. Then suddenly he started copying words we said and seemed to be learning new words every day. He now combines two or three words together into little phrases.
He’s also given us nicknames. He used to call us Mama and Dada, but one day decided to switch to Mamo and Dado instead and has stuck with it. I have no idea what inspired this, but it’s pretty cute!
He also says all the names of basic colors and many shapes. He likes to find rocks shaped like triangles in particular.
He is very interested in letters and numbers, which really surprised me at this age. I would never push that, but he has a Lego train set with numbers on it and he started asking about them and pretty quickly learned 0-9. He loves spotting numbers out in the world, like on speed limit signs! He also frequently asks me to count things like the number of berries on his plate or the number of stars on a page in a book (Mamo count).
He soon after started asking about letters in his books and knows many of the sounds now (I tell him the phonetic sound of the letter, rather than the letter name, which is what we do in Montessori). It is honestly amazing to me and I hope his interest in letters and words continues!
He also knows the names of the authors / illustrators of a lot of his book and if I forget to say it, he always chimes in.
Some of my favorite things he says:
“Mamo holdja” (As in, “Do you want me to hold ya? Hold ya.”
“More strawberries. Grocery store.”
“How are youuuuuu?” (Always high pitched and elongated.)
“More James!” (His request to watch a video of himself)
Personality
James is super social and friendly and is happy most of the time.
He loves meeting new people and offering them things, mostly rocks, to try to make friends. He often pretends to offer his food to a friend when he’s eating at home. If I ask who he’s giving it too, he always has someone specific in mind. He talks often of his friends at school, sometimes saying he wants to hug them.
He is full of energy and loves to be outside. His happy place is anywhere that has rocks, a creek, and snacks. We spend a lot of time at the Wildflower Center, the Austin Greenbelt, and various parks.
He also loves reading books, looking at photo books with family pictures, and singing songs. He’s gotten very particular about which songs he wants though. His current favorite is Old MacDonald (which he calls e-i-o).
I can’t express how much FUN this age is. It is relatively easy to get out and do all sorts of things now. It’s really fun to see his unique interests and personality develop more and more. There are times when I feel like he’s such a big kid, so independent and capable, and other times when it’s clear that he was a baby a few months ago. When I look at the youngest children in my class, it’s crazy for me to think that he’ll
